Thursday, August 30, 2018

There is Beauty in Brevity


There is a trend in Poetry MFA programs these days that encourages poets to eschew the use of  adjectives and adverbs,  Usually I say hogwash to this – English is a rich language, and we have many tools available to us.   A painter wouldn’t ignore  the range of colors in her paintbox – well, there was that Blue Period of Picasso’s…Part of the very essence of poetry is brevity. While we should always view our own work critically and remove unnecessary or redundant words, it mustn’t be at the expense of the imagery, cadence or meaning.

One way to really exercise your ability to embrace brevity is to write in short forms.  Last week, I touched briefly on the Mondo, a Japanese form comprised of 2 Katauta:  a 3 line stanza with syllable counts of 5,7,7.  In a Mondo, the first Katauta expresses a question, and the second, an answer.  A very structured form!  It can feel very restrictive at first, but very rewarding when you are successful.  This is my go-to form when the words or images coalesce into a question.  Then I build the stanzas around it.

Here are a few for your reading enjoyment.

Through such wet, grey weeks
I can scarcely rise each day
How can I embrace this gloom?

Let mist cool flushed cheeks,
relish lingering blossoms
gaze upon the green with grace.




When glowering clouds
Blind sunlight and smother warmth
do you give way to despair?

In white noise of rain,
Slow melancholy of birds;
Quiet dreams rise from rivers.



Do you count the days
as lashes upon your back,
beads upon a rosary?

My incense is sweet;
only lilies scar my hands,
rose windows illumine hours.

Thursday, August 23, 2018

Ask, Don't Tell


One of my favorite forms, the Mondo, has 2 stanzas of 3 lines, the first asking a question, and the second answering it, for example:

Young Dreams

O, beloved son
plucking a dandelion;
how will you find life’s flavor?

Learn to savor both
sunny blooms and bitter greens
whose seeds must scatter like dreams.


Writers are told to 'Show, don't tell.'  Sometimes, I like to leave a question hanging, in essence, 'Ask, don't tell.'  I think it leaves the resolution in the imagination of the reader, and  deepens the experience for them.  

This poem does not have a ‘formal’ form.  I have been playing with 2 question phrases – ‘Do cornflowers get the blues?’ and ‘Do tulips long for deep summer kisses?’ playing with personification and puns.  I expanded the florigelium (isn’t that a wonderful word?) and sequenced them seasonally.  The last stanza is a nod to the wild fires all over the west.


The Secret Lives of Flowers

When honeybees are sated
and pregnant wishes burst forth,
do dandelions roar in triumph?

When the hyacinth fades
and daffodils hang their heads,
do tulips long for deep summer kisses?

When petals curl, anthers darken
and stigmas drip their honey,
Do lilies mourn their virtue?

When shade forbids bloom
and leaves wilt on spindly stems,
do forget-me-nots fear dementia?

When ash fills the sky
and the sun burns like a blood orange,
do sunflowers pray for rain?