Commencement

Today I thought I’d share a bit about my process.  The following piece started as a riff on Tennyson.  I’d been watching a movie a couple of days ago where a poem by Tennyson that repeats the phrase 'In the spring' was recited.  I think the next impulses were  the last line, and  thinking about spring being a beginning or commencement.  My daughter is graduating high school in several weeks. That led to seeking phrases that supported spring, beginnings and graduation. 

As the lines developed, I noticed that the phrases I was  trying out all ranged from 7 to 10 syllables. I tried to bring them all to the same length, but so far, I’ve managed half at 8 and half at 10.  I'm not sure the exact number is important, just the rhythm. At the same time, I noticed that I was using some internal  slant rhyme, such as wonder/wander/under and “relationship” words such as ‘blink’ and then the next line ‘eyes,’ or ‘window’ and the next line ‘panes.’

I’m still working on the single instance of passive voice in the next to last line -

perhaps 'hasty hands jot memories by smiling panes.' or 'hasty hands scribble in memory books.'?

Commencement

In the spring, fragrant blossoming trees froth blossom bluster and snow.8

In the spring, dandelions dot tender green.8

In the spring, orange cones pock disheveled streets.8

In the spring, dusty bicycles emerge  rise from sleep.8

In the spring, eager pale pallid skin faces blink in wonder. 10

In the spring, teen eyes flit wander from textbook to window. 10

In the spring, memories are inscribed beneath under smiling panes. 10

In the spring, tassels flip adolescents to adults adolescence to adulthood. 10